


What A Girl Wants IV

by MeganOfSaints



Series: What A Girl Wants [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Almost Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, I didn't really know this was going to have a plot, Memories, Mutual Pining, Oops, PTSD, Pining, Sam is on a "diplomatic" mission to Wakanda, Smut, Sorry Not Sorry, Steve Rogers Is A Gentleman, Steve finally opens up, T'challa is his mission, Teasing, War flashbacks, kinda using the old Brubaker plot of multiple winter soldiers, new winter soldiers, no one is really complaining, red room flashbacks, story telling, that just means I get to write more smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-15
Updated: 2016-06-15
Packaged: 2018-07-15 06:43:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,850
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7212065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeganOfSaints/pseuds/MeganOfSaints
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha quirked an eyebrow at Bucky, who poured polenta into a boiling pot of water. “What are you suggesting?” </p><p>Bucky wiped his hands on the dish towel and moved around the island, smoothing his hands up her thighs and spreading her legs, stepping into her space. His mouth came within inches of hers and Natasha blushed as she felt his thumbs brushing higher and higher on her thighs. Just when she was sure he was going to kiss her, he whispered, “Convince him.”</p><p>OR: Natasha is getting tired of Steve's vague answers and explanations. She knows he's hiding his feelings, but she doesn't know how to get him to open up. Bucky has a solution.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What A Girl Wants IV

The quinjet raced over the Atlantic Ocean, the rain pounding the hull of the jet. The ocean below them teemed and rolled with fifty-foot swells, ready to swallow them whole if they malfunctioned. Natasha had to remind herself that this quinjet was not the titanic. The propulsors pushed them towards their destination; Siberia. Natasha sat next to Clint who was adjusting the mechanisms of his quiver. Steve sat across from her, prepping the Alpha Team which included her, Clint, Sharon, Tony, and Rhodey. Sam was busy on a diplomatic mission to Wakanda along with Wanda and Vision.

“…From there we should be able to break through the main barrier. As long as Tony and Rhodey take point at the main barrier, we shouldn’t have a need for the smoke shaft.”

Natasha watched as Rhodey continued to discuss rocket and arc reactor output with Tony, debating about how best to tear through two feet of iron and steel. The rest of them were silent. Natasha felt the icy chill of someone’s eyes on her and she looked over to Steve, hoping it was him. Blue eyes diverted from her own and she had to smile to herself. He was still acting skittish around her. She needed to talk to him. Needed to say something.

Her mind drifted to Bucky as she closed her eyes. She hoped he was sleeping. But knowing him better, he was probably making coffee at the wee hours of the morning and keeping the TV on in the background, trying to busy himself and try not to worry. He was probably fiddling with something mechanical or tech related, trying not to listen to the news.

 _We are making our final descent into Siberia, Mr. Stark._ F.R.I.D.A.Y’s voice rang through the metal of the jet and brought Natasha away from warmer thoughts of Bucky and into the freezing tundra of Siberia. Zipping up her suit and feeling the warming coils activate (courtesy of Tony), she let her muscles relax even though all she wanted to do was curl into a ball and try not to freeze to death.

The place brought back unwelcome memories. Flashes of red streaks across the snow and the pounding sound of helicopter blades. The howling of the never-ending wind and ice blowing in every direction.

“Home sweet home.” She muttered under her breath.

Looking around, her hair whipped in the wind, she was met with white and little spots of black. A town. Small and looking to be deserted. Tony’s mechanical voice spoke behind her, “Otrozhny, an abandoned gold mining colony.”

Natasha recognized the name, the history of the town, “The town dissolved once the mines were depleted and there wasn’t any other economic gain.”

“I wonder why they choose the mining tunnels.” Rhodey asked, “Bad guys don’t choose old mining tunnels for no reason. Do you think there is still precious metal down there?”

Tony disagreed, “There isn’t any other metal down there except you and I buddy.”

Steve said, “The entrance to the main shaft is three miles to the east. We better start walking. I don’t want to get caught here in the dark.”

“Afraid of the ghosts?” Tony teased. Steve gave him a dry glare and he said, “No.”

They all grabbed what they needed from the quinjet and set off to the east, trudging through the snow and ice and the bitingly cold wind. Tony had mentioned that F.R.I.D.A.Y suggested they land here, in the town. Something about too much structural damage underground to land the quinjet safely. Natasha dropped back from her spot at the front and went to walk next to Steve. He glanced at her and she noticed his eyebrows and eyelashes were already starting to freeze.

“Why did Fury send us out here?”

Steve glared at her, “Natasha, did you hear nothing about what I said at the briefing before we left?”

She shrugged, “I was thinking about something else.”

“It’s not good to be so distracted.” Steve chided her.

“It won’t happen again, Captain.” She grinned at him, giving him a mocking salute. Steve huffed and he looked out into the white void, “Hydra’s brought three heavy duty machines into private airspace twenty hours ago. However, they didn’t identify themselves which triggered an alert before the control tower was blown sky high.”

“Any idea what the three machines are?”

“They didn’t identify the cargo but from sonar signals from drones sent here a few hours ago, they look to be functioning and running on some kind of power.”

“I don’t have a good feeling Steve.” Natasha said. “I can’t explain the feeling.”

“It’s okay. You don’t have to. I trust you.” Steve smile at her. Her stomach flipped and she looked away for a moment, wondering if now was a bad time to bring up questions she wanted to ask him.

“Steve…”

“Hmm?” Steve said, looking to her.

“I need to ask you something.” Natasha said slowly. Steve blinked and his face suddenly became unreadable.

“Natasha now isn’t the time.”

“When else am I going to get the chance? We rarely see each other at the tower and when we do, you always seem in a rush to get somewhere else.”

Steve ducked his head, biting his lip and sighing, “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For running that morning. It was childish and I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry Steve. You obviously had your reasons.” Steve looked away, “I just want to know what those reasons were so I don’t upset you again.”

“You didn’t upset me.”

“Then what did I do?”

“It’s complicated, Natasha.”

“We have to walk two more miles. I think you can spare me a moment.”

Steve sighed and wiped his hands down his face, “First of all. Let me say that I never want to take Bucky away from you. You two are obviously happy and I don’t want to harm that. But being with both of you that night let me close to Bucky, and I realized that I might have gotten a bit too close.”

“Steve, we don’t mind if you get close.”

Steve stared at her, “But you’re together.”

“Doesn’t mean our hearts can’t be open to you.”

“Are you asking me to be in your relationship? Because…fuck, Natasha. That’s something I don’t know if I could do. I love Bucky.” Steve froze for a moment and then seemed to resign to what he just said. Natasha wasn’t surprised by his statement. She was actually waiting for it. “That night I opened up myself to be hurt by rejection. He doesn’t want me.”

“Yes, he does.” Natasha said, reaching for his hand.

Steve flinched away from her, “He doesn’t want _just_ me.”

Natasha blinked and thought for a moment, “You don’t want me.”

“That’s not what I said.”

“It’s what you’re implying.” Natasha said, a little defeated, “Steve. You cannot tell me that you don’t like the idea of both of us. You would have never come home with us the night of the gala.”

“I did it for Bucky.” Steve snapped, recoiling from her reaching hand, “Is that what you want me to say?”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Don’t put words in my mouth…” Steve said and was suddenly cut off as Tony called out ahead. The mining entrance was five hundred feet in front of him but all Natasha could see was white. Natasha retreated from Steve and returned to walking next to Clint who was rotating his quiver, getting it warmer.

“Tony and Rhodey take point,” Steve called and Natasha suddenly felt the heat blast from the arc reactors. Sparks and steam rose from the metal doors as the powerful beams melted through the locks. Natasha unlocked her holsters and pushed a button on her arm, diverting the warming coils into her fingers to warm them up.

Moving out to the side of the two metal men, making sure no one was going to attack them, Natasha pushed her talk with Steve out of her mind. But something about what he said was bothering her. He was hiding something from her.

The harsh noise of rendered metal ripped through the air as Tony and Rhodey pulled open two thick metal doors; the entrance to the mine.

Dropping down one at a time, the tunnel was small and cramped, the arc reactors creating beams of light. Natasha found herself ahead of the pack, leading the way with both Rhodey and Tony next to her, the beams of light guiding her through the tunnels. Gripping her handgun, Natasha pushed open two wooden doors, which lead into a massive underground cavern. She had to stop walking if she didn’t plan to fall into a pit. Wooden platforms, when first built, must have been a descending slope to bring people down safely. Now the boards were rotting through and were broken in many places, some of the breaks looking recent.

“We may not be alone.” Natasha relayed the information to the rest of the team. Sharon came up beside her and Natasha saw her pull something from her pocket and toss it into the pit. As it left her fingers, the object sparked and exploded, illuminating the pit and hissing, releasing a gas as it descended.

A few moments later, Natasha tensed as she heard people shouting in panic and then bodies hitting the ground. Strangled gasps and then silence followed.

Holding onto Rhodey, Natasha was flown into the pit and Steve landed next to her in the following moments. Clint and Sharon were brought down a few minutes later.

It was dark in the pit until Clint managed to find the power box and flip the lights on. They were old lanterns, meant to house lightbulbs way past due of being changed. Six bodies were scattered across the ground, three in front of a console and three others scattered around the pit. But that wasn’t what concerned Natasha.

While three large cylindrical machines had whirred to life as soon as Clint turned on the power, there were four large machines in the pit. Three glowed and steamed, but the fourth remained dark. The cylinders were built with iron and thick plated glass and hissed and bubbled.

“Hey! Tony.” Clint called and Natasha looked over to where Clint was looking at a table covered in medical and scientific utensils. Clint tossed Tony a vial of colorless fluid and Tony said, “I can’t analyze this right now. But I’ll bring it back to the lab for Banner. It might answer a few questions. Anything else that might be of use?”

“Just notes and books.”

“We’ll box it all. Hydra won’t need it.” Sharon said, pulling a cell phone from her pants, putting it to her ear.

Walking up to one of the large cylinders, Natasha brushed the frost away from the glass and froze in place. She knew the face. She knew the blonde hair and brown eyes that were now hidden behind closed eyelids.

She spun around, “Shut it down. Disconnect all of them.”

“Woah!” Steve said, stopping her from putting a bullet into the cryo-chamber. “What are you doing?”

She glared at him with something behind her eyes that Steve recognized as fear. Taking a look at the chambers, Steve noticed a body inside of the cylinder and he recoiled as well. “Who are they?”

“Winter Soldiers.”

 

Hours later, Natasha sat in Bucky’s lap with a steaming mug of hot chocolate as he rubbed her back. They were in Stark Tower since Natasha was expected to give briefings to different sects of S.H.I.E.L.D. She felt too small, too scared to do anything but let Sharon and Steve talk. She never thought she would see those faces again.

“What did they do to the cylinders?” Bucky asked, his voice cautious.

“I watched them disconnect and open the cryo-chambers. They were injected with something…I don’t know. The team wouldn’t tell me. I assume it was poison because they died soon after. Their bodies were transported to Seoul, South Korea to Dr. Helen Cho to analyze their tissues and brains.”

“They won’t come back, Natalia. They are gone.” Bucky’s voice was soft and his hands were warm against her back. She sunk back into his chest, curling her fingers into his metal ones. His lips pressed into her temple and she said,

“I can’t help it. They are resilient. God, I feel like a little girl again, afraid of the soldiers who were brought in to teach us discipline.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you if anyone tries to harm you.”

“I can still hear their shouting and voices. It was so different. I could tell it was them just from how their gun’s fired. I can still feel their hands grabbing me and putting me into choke holds and pinning me against a concrete floor.” She said, her fingers wrapping around the mug in her hands and her eyes glazing over, a time gone past flickering through her mind.  

“I know them. Perhaps not as well as you. But that’s not what I remember.” Bucky said, brushing his flesh and blood hand over her arm. “I remember looking across the sparring mat at a fiery redhead, perhaps not even seventeen, who looked like she was ready to take off my head.” Bucky smiled, even though she couldn’t see his face. It was her that brought him warmth in the cold of the military base. “I remember she was so strong. She was always awarded top marks for fighting. They called you a _true black widow_. I remember one night, hearing a knock at my door. It was odd because no one came to see me once the day was over, once my use was over. It was the redhead, the one who gained top marks for fighting.”

Bucky remembered how she seemed so small and frail to him. She barely had a woman’s body and yet she had seen things not even adults would dare to admit. Her eyes were bright, not yet dulled by the jaded memories he saw in her eyes years later. Freckles covered her cheeks like constellations. Her hair was tied into a severe knot at the top of her head to sleep without her hair tangling during the night. He remembered she was beautiful, more so than even a goddess.

“She told me that she was planning to escape and that she promised to take me with her if I helped her. I remember asking her why she wanted to escape. She told me that she didn’t want to be a monster. I remember telling her she might not have a choice. She said she didn’t care with such fire in her eyes that it took my breath away.”

In truth, Bucky vaguely remembered the events that led up to Natalia trying to escape the Red Room. He could vaguely see a girl being dragged by her hair into a room of soldiers and beaten to a pulp while he was forced to watch. She was silent for most of the torture until one of them turned to him and forced him to beat her too. That’s when she started screaming. A long time ago Natalia Romanova made him remember what it was to be human and they punished them both for that, in different ways.

Bucky shook his head, ridding himself of the awful memory. Natasha was silent in his arms as Bucky took the mug of cocoa from her hands and placed it on the table. She seemed to be off in her own head and released the mug at a gentle coaxing. Bucky’s arms slid around her, his hands warm and cool against her warm body.

“It was a week or so later when she came to me for something else. Do you remember it, Natalia? Her eyes held a different kind of fire. They looked me up and down and then she closed and locked my door. She walked me backward onto my makeshift mattress and kissed me. I remember being so shocked that I pushed her away at first. She was so young. Part of me knew that it was wrong. But the other part of me, the stronger part, knew that I’d never hurt her. So, I took her to bed and she told me about herself. She told me about her memories that got fuzzier every day as I took her into my mouth and kissed her between her legs.”

Natasha started to squirm in his arms, her hips undulating on top of his as his hands inched slowly down her torso.

“I never tasted anything sweeter in my life. Her gasps of pleasure were music to my ears. And when I’d wrung every spasm from her body, she pulled me into her arms and took me into her body like she was welcoming me home. I could not describe the feeling. It was tight and warm and wet and everything I’d ever desired. I came inside of her at her command and I felt like a lost soul, beckoned to heaven by her light.”

Natasha was breathing heavier now and her face had turned into his neck, kissing his pulse point and making his voice waver as he told the story of their first time together. He was happy he could remember so much of it with clarity, even if it might not be every detail. It wasn’t the last time they were together. There were other times after that, in hallways, dark corners, and many times in his room. She helped him start to heal, start to make sense of the foreign world he was forced to take part in.

“Bucky…” She breathed, her hands overlapping his own and pressing his hands into her skin, gripping her waist. “Please.”

“What do you need doll?” Bucky asked low in her ear, his warm breath ghosting over her skin. Everything was warm and inviting and it was making her brain go fuzzy. Coupled with his story and his emotions that came pouring out of him, she didn’t know whether to make love to him or to hold him and never let him go.

“Natasha, you’re needed in the lab for analysis on the vial with Tony, plus…” Steve’s voice filtered in from the hall to the communal living room. Steve stopped dead at the sight before him. Natasha with her back pressed to Bucky’s front, his hands intertwined with hers as he gripped her closer. Her head was laid on his shoulder, his lips millimeters away from hers.

Natasha glared at him, “Why do I need to be in the lab? Tony and Banner and Dr. Foster are more apt to describing chemical concoctions than I am.”

Steve fiddled with his fingers, his eyes flickering to Bucky’s face, who was watching his own with a mix of interest and loathing. No doubt because Steve just interrupted whatever was about to happen. Steve felt a little sick. He should have just told her the truth. He should have just come clean.

Now, she was looking at him like he was the scum of the earth. “Uh, Dr. Banner believed with your experience with the Red Room might be of help to what materials they were using.”

“Are you going?” She asked.

Steve nodded, “Every Alpha Team Member is needed in the lab. You were just the last person I needed to find.”

Natasha rose from the sofa, Bucky forgotten as his hands dropped from her waist. Natasha already missed the warmth. She marched past Steve, a determined gaze covering her features as she barked, “Let’s go soldier.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Steve muttered, his eyes staying on Bucky’s as he felt like he needed to say something. Anything. But _anything_ felt too wrong.

Bucky just watched him turn and follow Natasha down the hall, sighing and wiping his hands over his face. This wasn’t going to be easy. None of them felt comfortable talking to each other and _something_ happened on that mission. He figured he would ask her later when she was in a better mood.

 

 

“What you’re looking at is the chemical mixture of nitric acid and hydrochloric acid,” Tony announced, the complex mixture being projected in front of them, the hexagons and numbers floating and rotating so they could all get a better view.

Dr. Banner said, “This mixture is known as Aqua Regia, a famous concoction known to dissolve gold and platinum.”

Tony finished, “The presence of Aqua Regia in the pit of the Siberian mining camp speaks volumes. From the samples that we took from the floors and from what Bruce and I have discovered in old records is that this mining camp was known for mining gold. But why would you want to dissolve gold?

“The simple answer is because they found something more valuable.” Tony pressed a button on his keyboard and a new element’s chemical structure replaced the Aqua Regia. It was complicated and Natasha couldn’t read the tiny scrawl, most likely Bruce’s. “This is Osmiridium. It is a hard metal and can be found in old pen nibs because of its anti-corrosive nature.”

“But why is it more valuable?” Coulson asked, “If they found gold down in those mines, they would have made more money selling the gold than this osmiridium.”

Sharon, who had been quiet for a while, spoke up, “Tony and I are wondering the same thing. But digging a little more into some old Soviet files, the miners were offered large amounts of money for this metal. Their employer is still unknown, but we’ll be able to get the clearance on those files in a few days.”

“What were they using the osmiridium for?” Natasha asked.

Bruce offered, “We were hoping you could help with a few theories. Tony and I know they are often used with writing utensils and it can also be used to coat other corrosive metals to protect them from wear. But that’s about the extent of its use.”

“I was never given access to the Soviet science division. I’m in the dark on this. Plus, there is the point of the status of the Winter Soldier’s that were brought in.” Natasha looked to Sharon, who said,

“They were disposed of this morning, given last rites and then cremated. Dr. Helen Cho promised us it was humane, even if what they deserve is far from it. She collected the tissue samples and said she will have the results of the labs we sent her in a week or so.”

“What does it all have to do with each other?” Clint asked, “From what we’ve all learned, Hydra doesn’t just try to revive three more Winter Soldier’s and then give up so easily.”

“We don’t know Clint,” Sharon said, looking to Steve. “Captain Rogers is working on a strategy to try to flush out any information that could be useful. But it might take a while. Our main priority is what Hydra wanted with the three soldiers in cryo-chambers and what they were trying to accomplish.”

 

A few hours later and Natasha and Bucky found themselves dorming in one of the extra residential rooms in Stark Tower. She was too tired to make her way home at this time of night. She sat at one of the bar stools as Bucky tried his hand at cooking. He seemed to be getting better at it as the years went by. He said it was helpful when he could feel an attack coming. He said that centering himself on something as simple as cutting an onion was something that helped calm his mind.

She smiled and took a sip of her beer as he added bacon to a traditional Romanian comfort food called _Pomana Porcului,_ traditionally a Christmas dish, but something Bucky was determined to perfect.

“What did he say?” Bucky asked.

“He said he wanted you. Just you.”

Bucky frowned, “That seems like a cheap cop-out of an explanation. I need a few more details, Natalia. What did he say…exactly?”

She sighed, “He confessed to liking what that night was about. But he was scared that he let himself open up too much, let himself believe that that night he had a chance with you. He sounded like he wanted a relationship with just you. He said…” She paused, “He said that night was only for you.”

Bucky frowned, “That seems a little cold for Steve.”

“I told him I didn’t believe him.”

“And what did he say after that?”

“Nothing. We had found the entrance to the mining caves and now he won’t talk to me. I don’t know, call me crazy but I know he’s not telling me something. He’s being too vague. People are only vague when they are hiding something.” Natasha shrugged, “Maybe I need to stop pushing.”

Bucky shook his head, “I wasn’t there. But from what you told me, I can tell he’s hiding something. You don’t have threesomes with people you hate. You do it because you like the idea of both of the people. I think you need to approach it differently.”

“How? I’ve tried talking to him. Obviously, he doesn’t want to.”

“So, don’t talk.”

Natasha quirked an eyebrow at Bucky, who poured polenta into a boiling pot of water. “What are you suggesting?”

Bucky wiped his hands on the dish towel and moved around the island, smoothing his hands up her thighs and spreading her legs, stepping into her space. His mouth came within inches of hers and Natasha blushed as she felt his thumbs brushing higher and _higher_ on her thighs. Just when she was sure he was going to kiss her, he whispered, “Convince him.”

“ _Oh_!” She squeaked, catching his meaning. She leaned back and she frowned, “Are you sure?”

“Doll, there is nothing hotter than the idea of my best girl seducing Steve. Hell, I could barely control myself when I woke the morning after to see him eating you out. Go bring him back to us.”

“Now?”

“Considering that you wanted to go back to the penthouse tomorrow, tonight is your best bet. Just…” Bucky said, his voice getting soft and intertwining their fingers, “If you want to go all the way, bring him back here. I don’t think I could stand the idea of him ravishing you by himself.”

Natasha felt a gush of warmth between her legs. She smirked, his lips curling into a devilish smile, “Yes sir.” She watched his pupils blow wide at her words and she pushed off the bar stool, heading to Steve’s condo in Stark Tower.

 

 

_…sounds of a train screeching along iron tracks…_

_…bitter cold wind whipping through his hair…_

_…an explosion, a tremendous sound of wrenching metal, and then a scream…_

Steve was jolted out of a nightmare when he heard a knock on his door. Steve looked at the clock on the table. The only person who would knock on his door this late was Coulson with a mission file. No one else bothered him once he shut himself up in his apartment. He shook his head, ridding himself of the awful memory, He put down the book he was reading, which he must have fallen asleep on, and marched to the door and pulled it open.

Natasha leaned against the door frame, knowing it would take Steve a minute or two to open the door. Butterflies swirled in her stomach. It shouldn’t bother her. She’d seduced so many men that it wouldn’t be a difference to her. But she had been able to remove herself emotionally from the play and flirting. She didn’t get that choice now.

Steve opened the door and his eyes widened, taking in Natasha’s scantily clad form. She wore the shortest shorts, made of a very flimsy material, obviously meant for sleeping. She did have a massive t-shirt on, something that was doubtfully Bucky’s. Steve swallowed roughly at that image in his head.

“Hi. Natasha, I wasn’t expecting you.” He said, inviting her in.

She said, “I felt bad for my pushiness on the mission. Perhaps it wasn’t the best time to talk about what happened between us.”

“Natasha, please, put the thing to rest. It happened. It won’t happen again.”

“Only if you don’t want it to,” Natasha said, watching Steve’s movements very carefully. He worried his bottom lip with his teeth and had his hands in his pockets. She took a step towards him and he backed up a step, the back of his knees hitting the arm of the sofa.

“Natasha…”

“Sit down Steve.” She said and she could see that he was two seconds away from arguing with her. “You won’t regret it.”

Steve moved and sat down on the couch. Steve’s eyes almost popped out of his head as Natasha reached for the hem of her shirt and pulled it up and over her head, revealing nothing but an open expanse of skin. Steve swallowed audibly and his fingers itched to touch the soft skin. Her breasts were more beautiful than he remembered and he knew how well they fit in his hands. His heart raced at the sight of her and he felt his throat closing.

Natasha walked to him and slid into his lap, straddling his legs and pressing herself close to him. “I can’t stop thinking about you, Steve. That’s the truth.” She ran a few fingers down his temples, over his jaw and stopped in front of his lips, red and plump. “I can’t stop thinking about how you felt between Bucky and I. You’re mouth on mine.” She whispered, her lips brushing his own and making him ache to kiss her.

Before she could stop herself, she leaned down and captured his lips with her own. He moaned at the contact and cupped her face in his hands while he returned her kiss. Tears welled in Natasha’s eyes as she buried her lips against his collarbone, over the small silver scar that she had noticed on his shoulder that night so long ago. Such strength. Such love. She would give anything to have a man love her the way he loved Bucky.

More to the point, she wanted Steve to love her. She wanted his heart. No man should walk eternity alone. No one should ever be hurt the way he’d been hurt. Not when his only crime was loving someone more than he loved himself.

Steve groaned as her thighs gripped him and pushed his hard cock against the apex of her legs, igniting a fire so hot that it terrified him. He needed her so much that it was almost too painful to think about.

Push her away. The logical side of him said. He would only hurt her. But he couldn’t. Not tonight. Not after the nightmares that were still fresh in his mind. Right or wrong, he needed comfort. He wanted to feel loved again.

Natasha said, “I miss your warmth and your smile and your beautiful body.” Steve yelped as she reached down and cupped him through his pants.

“Oh _god_.” Steve moaned against her lips.

His entire body throbbed and ached as she stroked his hot, rigid shaft. His breathing ragged, he trembled from the feel of her fingers gripping him, her palm brushing up, along the shaft.

“I miss how you feel inside me…” Natasha whispered against his lips, which were now parted and panting lightly at her ministrations.

Steve trailed his hands slowly over her body, savoring every dip and curve. Savoring the feel of her soft skin and the soft material of the shorts she was wearing. He nuzzled her neck, feeling her pulse under his nose. He was all sinewy power. It rippled from his body into hers. Those sleek, toned muscles flexed around her with every graceful move he made. But even more captivating was the restrained power he showed. Like a fierce lion ready to strike.

“I want more of you. I want to feel you inside me again.” Natasha panted against his skin, her hands still teasing him but not touching him outright.

He wanted her with an inhuman need. Wanted things from her that he’d dare not ask. These thoughts of claiming her, of keeping her, should not be on his mind.

And yet they were.

Natasha ran her hands through his hair. She held him close as he nibbled his way from her lips to her throat, then down to her breasts where he took his time tasting her. His tongue circled her hardened nipple, teasing and stroking. He seemed insatiable as he devoured her like a starving man at a banquet.

“I could hurt you.” Steve said, eyes barely open as his tongue laved her nipples, fingers and palms digging into her hips.

“You couldn’t hurt me.”

“I already did.” Steve said and Natasha stopped her ministrations against his cock. Steve looked up at her when he felt the movement of her hand cease. She frowned at him as he told her, “I made you believe I didn’t want you.” He kissed the underside of her jaw and she hummed at the gentle gesture. “It’s not true. I just don’t want to lose you. I’ve grown to trust you over the years and I don’t want to break that trust.”

Tears welled in her eyes once more, threatening to spill this time as she said, “Steve, you idiot.”

He pulled away from her and said, “I’m sorry Natasha. I was too cowardly to tell you. I figured it would be easier to make you believe that I didn’t want you.”

“You didn’t do a great job at hiding it. You know, if you don’t want someone, you shouldn’t sleep with them. Just a rule of thumb.”

“Yea.” He whispered sheepishly, “I guess that’s true.”

She laughed at his ridiculous logic and she yelped suddenly when Steve palmed her breasts, taking a nipple into his hot mouth and he nibbled for a moment before popping off and said, “I believe you said something about wanting me inside you. Or was that a ploy to get me to confess?”

“You knew?” Natasha felt a little dumbfounded.

“I know all your tricks, Natasha.” Steve said, the smirk on his face absolutely devastating. “But does the offer still stand?” Steve traced his hands down her sides to grab her ass, fully prepared to rip her shorts in half.

Natasha grabbed his hands, stopping him and making him frown, “Did I do something? I’m sorry.”

“No. You’re perfect babe.” She said, kissing his nose, “But I was sent down here with the promise to bring you back up if you wanted to ravish me.”

Steve blinked for a moment, letting her words sink in before he gripped her thighs and lifted her into his arms. Natasha yelped in surprise and wrapped her arms around his neck, feeling the vibrations of his laughter through his skin. She could feel him laughing all the way up the stairs.

**Author's Note:**

> I never intended to write this smut with so much plot. I do like the idea and I want to continue writing it. Thank you for reading and as always, comments and kudos are always appreciated. :)
> 
> Smut and gratuitous sex will be in the next chapter! ;)


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